flashing images before death.

when people talk about life, its hard to spot a new fresh kind of life. everyone has many boyfriends/girlfriends and as many break ups, or they had a good life etc, etc. its almost a repeated pattern God seemed to have made. same things happen to different people. its a boring pattern, and im just part of it. oh well. ive got nothing to write about anyways, so lets see the labels that are few (more will come) attachments to my life, another boring one (:

Me: i am a person who believes in following the heart. others give me opinions and choices, but its me who choose my right steps. that way i wont regret what i decide. im 'old' in various ways; be it character or appearance. 'old soul' as they may say it. i tend to advice/nag on people about what they do, so that makes me feel old. i look beyond my age. im 16 but at 14 people asked me of my poly/A levels. and at 14 i've started shaving facial hair. being good-natured is something i try to improve in myself. i choose to be nice and 'soft-spoken' because i want to be pleasant and appreciated by people in this way. i stick fairly close to my religion, yet i know im 'holesome' in many ways. but there is time for me to improve. i'm frank when prompted, cause honesty means great things. my mentality has a mix of good and bad, but exposing my goodness is better than the other. being good is something i want. and after reading all this, you'd really find me boring. but thats cause who i am. just a boring person. even i'd agree to that (:

Friends: they are one thing i never want to regret in my life. for a quiet person, i have plenty of friends. from school friends to camp friends who are still in touch, God bless you all. they play a part in my nurturing and spoiling, even if they may not know as they experience different lives, different ages. they are all appreciated. we share good times and there were some unfortunate bad times, but that's life. like what julyanna would say: 'without challenges, life would be very boring' i used to wish there weren't any challenges, but i have to admit that she is right. i may have lost some friends along the walk, through fights or merely losing contact, but i thank them for being there in a portion of my life.an apology to all if what wrong seem to have been done by me and i hope its just something we can talk and laugh about later. i've learnt and shared many things with friends, and i hope i use such knowledge for the greater future. once again, God bless all of you, love you guys.

Family: i'd say i'm the least expressive in the 50 odd population. naturally me. but being with my family does take away some worries. though they fight often, they are fun-loving people. and i'd dare say im proud to be part of my family, being labelled the 'quiet one' or 'bisu'. cousins are mostly girls, but thats okay. its the blood that never seperates us. for all of them to party and enjoy together, its just a great sight for me. when they are happy, it makes me happy too. (verrrry gay. (: ) my mum and dad are two great, hardworking people. they play amazing parts in taking care of us and the well-being of the family. i appreciate their help. i know they are expecting alot from me as im the first boy, but i will do my best, because i dont want to only benefit myself but them too. my siblings, we fight and quarrel too much. but when we are old and wrinkly and too weak to fight with one another, we'll just look back at the times laughing at how we were. (abdullah being fat, ashran being naughty, amirah being bossy and me being awfully quiet) we have our fun times too and as long as we are family, it stays that way. and i want it to.

School: 'telok kurau sec is a shitty school' i won't deny it. but the four year i've been in it, its not as bad as what i'd imagine. stinky environment, blah blah blah. its all what you get, and its all what you have to live with. some teachers are crappy some teachers are great. same goes for students. its the whole package, almost a balance. almost. my studies aren't marvelous and top-notch. neither are they expected. i've disappointed many in this. but there are a few weeks to O's and i can decide my future with the time i have. i will get my success, by working hard. (and maybe pause the blogging.) my aim after secondary school is to go to Singapore Polytechnic, for the drama and psychology course. but after leaving the 'home', being where i want or not, i would still miss the place, i daresay. they were left with pleasant memories.


well this is all the pathetic effort i could think of thus far, mainly the big factors of my life so far. time goes by and things come in and go out. more updates will come too. haha. till then, God bless everyone and everything i've mentioned in this one. (:

fullstopped at 8:23 p.m.